One day, while my daughter was happily distracted in her own marker drawings, I decided to risk pulling out a new sketchbook I had special ordered. It had dark paper, and was perfect for adding highlights to. I had only drawn a little in it, and was anxious to try it again, but knowing our daughter’s love of art supplies, it meant that if I wasn’t sly enough, I might have to share. (Note: I’m all about kid’s crafts, but when it comes to my own art projects, I don’t like to share.) Since she was engrossed in her own project, I thought I might be able to pull it off.
Ahhh, I should’ve known better. No longer had I drawn my first face (I love drawing from old black & white movie stills) had she swooped over to me with an intense look. “OOOH! Is that a NEW sketchbook? Can I draw in that too, mama?” I have to admit, the girl knows good art supplies when she sees them. I muttered something about how it was my special book, how she had her own supplies and blah blah blah, but the appeal of new art supplies was too much for her to resist. In a very serious tone, she looked at me and said, “If you can’t share, we might have to take it away if you can’t share.”
Oh no she didn’t! Girlfriend was using my own mommy-words at me! Impressed, I agreed to comply. “I was going to draw a body on this lady’s face,” I said. “Well, I will do it,” she said very focused, and grabbed the pen. I had resigned myself to let that one go. To let her have the page, and then let it go. I would just draw on my own later, I decided. I love my daughter’s artwork, truly I do! But this was MY sketchbook, my inner kid complained.
Not surprisingly, I LOVED what she drew. I had drawn a woman’s face, and she had turned her into a dinosaur-woman. It was beautiful, it was carefree, and for as much as I don’t like to share, I LOVED what she had created. Flipping through my sketchbook, I found another doodle of a face I had not yet finished. She drew a body on it, too, and I was enthralled. It was such a beautiful combination of my style and hers. And she LOVED being a part of it. She never hesitated in her intent. She wasn’t tentative. She was insistent and confident that she would of course improve any illustration I might have done. …And the thing is, she DID.
Soon, she began flipping through my sketchbook, looking for more heads. “Do you have any heads for me today?” she would ask me each morning. So I began making a point at night to draw some faces for her (which was my pleasure–faces are my favorite part, anyway). She would then pick up a pen with great focus, and begin to draw. Later, I would add color and highlights, texture and painting, to make a complete piece. Sometimes she filled in the solid areas with colored markers, but I would always finish with acrylics later on my own.
Sometimes I would give her suggestions, like “maybe she could have a dragon body!” but usually she would ignore theses suggestions if it didn’t fit in with what she already had in mind. But since I am a grownup and a little bit (okay a lot) of a perfectionist, I sometimes would have a specific idea in mind as I doodled my heads. Maybe she could make this into a bug! I’d think happily to myself as I sketched, imagining the possibilities of what it could look like. So later, when she’d doodle some crazy shape that seemed to go in some surrealistic direction, or put a large circle around the creature and filled the WHOLE THING in with marker, part of my brain would think, What is she DOING?!? She’s just scribbling it all up! But I should know that in most instances, kids’ imaginations way outweigh a grownup’s, and it always ALWAYS looked better that what I had imagined. ALWAYS.
For example, the filled-in marker of the one above, she told me, was a chrysalis, for the caterpillar to transform into a butterfly. Of COURSE it is. I never would have thought of that. And that’s why kids make awesome artists.
Later, I would show her what I had done with our drawings–the painting and coloring. She seemed to critique them pretty harshly. “That’s silly, mama.” or “you put WATER behind her?” But for the most part, she enjoyed them. I enjoyed them. I LOVE them.
And from it all, here are the lessons I learned: to try not to be so rigid. Yes, some things (like my new sketchbook) are sacred, but if you let go of those chains, new and wonderful things can happen. Those things you hold so dear cannot change and grow and expand unless you loosen your grip on them a little. In sharing my artwork and allowing our daughter to be an equal in our collaborations, I helped solidify her confidence, which is way more precious than any doodle I could have done. In her mind, her contributions were as valid as mine (and in truth, they really were). Most importantly, I learned that if you have a preconceived notion of how something should be, YOU WILL ALWAYS BE DISAPPOINTED. Instead, just go with it, just ACCEPT it, because usually something even more wonderful will come out of it.
SIDE NOTE: As an idea (mainly for myself) I decided to put just a few of our collaborative prints up for sale on a site called Society 6. I purchased one myself (the space beavers, called “Outer Face”) to see how they would turn out, and I’m pretty happy with it. We’ve done dozens and dozens of collaborative sketches, but I only put a few up as prints. I’m not sure what to do with the others. Maybe make a children’s book out of them? Make poems to go along? I’m not sure, but I love them with a very large portion of my heart, and they need a special place.
busy mockingbird 
You should ABSOLUTELY create an Interactive colouring book! Include a couple of the collaborations you & your daughter worked on, & then provide a bunch of your heads, & a bunch of your daughter’s bodies, for others to finish themselves!
I’ve been suggested that; I like it!
Please hurry and make this book so my 2 month old daughter can get inspired by such gorgeousness.
I’ve got it in the works!
I love this post so much!!! 😀 Everything you wrote and all of the photos you shared are wonderful!!
Very Cool! Loved every bit of it- says me who cannot draw a staight line but has a neice who is absolutely amazing- . Megan blows my mind away with what she can do. Truly gifted!
Absolutely amazing, incredible, and delightful! And what a powerful lesson about creativity and “letting go!”
I think you should find a cool space, get these blown up on canvas (or make new ones on canvas… because… why not?) and throw a gallery show. Have fun with it. And when people buy them up, throw some (or all) into her college fund. Art Center in Pasadena is expensive! 😉 I too have a little artist and am an artist myself, so I relate to this on so many levels! Thank you for sharing your beautiful work!
I love these, my cousin posted a link to this on his facebook and of course I am sooooo glad I clicked it. I love the first one, dragon girl with flowy hair. was she one of the first you did? hence not as much colouring?
I cant wait to find a spot for it in my room!
Yes exactly! One of the first ones. I’m glad you like it!
tRuly amazing. Heading out to buy my four y/o an easel right now. Can’t thank you enough!
This style of artwork is really lovely- both you and your daughter are quite talented. As soon as my new phone arrives, I plan on buying at least one or two of those iPhone skins (‘Lovely Creature’ and ‘Into the Storm’ are my favorites).
Does your daughter draw spiders or ghosts? 🙂
Thanks! No, mostly dinosaurs, dragons, animals and bugs, but occasionally a ghost gets in there somewhere…
Respect:)
A book of poems for children would be incredible. These are wonderful!
Thank you! I’m working in some ideas…
Very beautiful and what a very unique creation.
Bought two prints immediately after reading this! “Into the Storm” and “Up and Down Friends.” Beautiful work!
This is such an amazing idea!
ahhhhh outer face. thats awesome! had i the money and prior knowledge i totally would have bought that one!
Absolutely gorgeous. Make a book please 🙂
I also think that it is such a great outcome! And you little one clearly has allot of fantasies in her head. Of you feel like you want to do some good with the prints then maybe you could speak to a childrens hospital to put them up?
Awh, these are lovely! I recently did a pseudo-collaboration with my nephew (check out his adorable octopus! http://shonataylor.com/alexs-octopus/) but these are really special.
[…] Collaborating with a 4-year Old […]
I would love to make poems for these!!!!
This is simply amazing from any point of view. I loved the idea at first sight but the way you’ve put it with words is absolutely wonderful. Thank you very much for sharing this; it’s something everybody can learn from, be it about drawing, parenting or just life.
I’d love to see a book of rather Dr. Seussian poems for each ‘being’. How wonderful would that be?
Reblogged this on Matthew Sylvester and commented:
I think this is amazing. I love to share things with the girls, as does Karen, and we also go through the ‘don’t do that you’ll spoil it’ stage. The way these things have turned out is great. I just wish I could draw as well as this so I could do the same thing with my kids.
Is there any way i can get a commission done? i would LOVE to see what you and your daughter would come up with and draw/paint of my portrait.
How old is your daughter? I like her style! You’re both very talented. As a creative person myself, I would love to do a collaboration with my son someday. I think it would make a great children’s book and teach a good lesson about working together and different ideas/minds/people mixing into a beautiful outcome. You could totally do the illustrations on one page and a collaborative poem on the next. I’d totes buy it to teach my son about such things. Keep up the great work!
– Lisa
Love the pictures – and reminds me of a project I organised, to create a textile piece with the young folk at our church. What I had in my mind didn’t happen at all, yet the end result was so much more for allowing the kids free rein on their individual pieces.
I’m a writer, and my kids often help me write my stories…
Absolutely awesome. Inspiring. Fantastic. Well done.
I love these pictures! They really are beautiful. Love that your daughter taught you about sharing (our children do have an uncanny habit of quoting us, when we least expect it).
They could really help a book of poems come to life…
“if you have a preconceived notion of how something should be, YOU WILL ALWAYS BE DISAPPOINTED. Instead, just go with it, just ACCEPT it, because usually something even more wonderful will come out of it”
this is a lovely lesson for life and one which I try to share with my children… living in the unknown and being present is the space where the magic happens… living in our already lived past, or imagined future blinds our eyes and shuts our ears to the ordinary miracles unfolding before us…
thank you (and your daughter) so much for sharing these x
Hi, I would purchase a book of these in a heartbeat. I think they are sublime. If you do make a collection (no poems) please email me so i can buy it. Milesmaxwell333@me.com
I think you over indulge your kid. Most kids are average or below. Nothing wrong with that, but American parenting has gone haywire.
I love this! I’m a big fan of children’s artwork, it’s often very surreal. This is just amazing, wonderful!!
i am in love with this
i am an artist myself and have a 5 year old daughter who loves to join in with me 🙂
would adore to see more of these please
These are stunning; what a great message. A children’s book with the story incorporated would be beautiful.
[…] won’t you just grow up!!” – but what if that helper was just a 4 year old child? When Mica Angela Hendricks, a professional illustrator, bought a new sketchbook, her young daughter ditched her own art […]
Make a website devoted to them and collect advertisers. Make money off of the advertising. Use the money for her college fund or *gasp* to buy her more, better art supplies 🙂
These are incredible! I Love them! Even more I love what they represent. You are a wonderful mother and a great example for all of us. I will be purchasing a few to remind myself not to worry so much about perfection. These are so much better than what they would have been had you not shared 🙂
Reblogged this on Anne Surly and commented:
These are so amazing!
love this so much — have shared it widely!
We’d love to sell your book in our shop. An inspirational collaboration, the drawings are brilliant!
> Impressed, I agreed to comply.
This isn’t the fucking UN. You don’t hold negotiation talks with your children. If you don’t want her using your art supplies, don’t let her. If she pulls some jedi bullshit like she did, remind her that she’s the child and you’re the adult.
I appreciate your assessment of my parenting style. I’ll be sure to consult you on next decision I make!
I am amazed at the pictures she drew at such a young age. Yes you did good teaching her about art and life. I am very proud of you both. Love you
Any chance of you selling sketchbooks with your drawings so that our kids could complete them themselves? I love this so much, but I don’t have the artistic ability to do it. I’d definitely pay money for your heads and my kids’ drawings, though!!
I think I will include some doodle pages when I put it together. Thank you!
I LOVED this. I am an opera director, but the lesson applies just the same….. give up perfection for something even more amazing!
Thank you for sharing….
This is so inspiring. I hold a child’s psyche near and dear. I would be honored if you would consider letting me model. Please keep the muse alive! ❤
[…] Mutter gemeinsam zeichnet, zeigt Mica Angela Hendricks auf ihrem Blog busymockingbird: sie nennt es Collaborating with a 4 year old und beschreibt, was sie mit ihrer Tochter gemeinsam wie entwickelt hat und wie sie gearbeitet […]
I’m so glad I found you too! Dunja Schandin posted your link of facebook. First, you are an incredible artist, and I love all you wrote. But most touching is your relationship with your darling little girl and how you appreciate her and she appreciates you. Of course it should be that way, but often it’s not. And the fact you both enjoying doing the same thing – the thing you both love – is a priceless gift.
And then there’s what you did with the pictures. Wonderful.
If you or your daughter ever wanted to draw my ghost orphans please feel free. I’d love to see them!
Thanks for the giggle, nice story and charming pictures. There has to be a place for all of them. Or many places.
Good luck!
What a wonderful lesson for us all, no matter what we hold sacred and want to be perfect. Your words, but most especially, your collaborative art brought me to tears. Thank you for sharing.
[…] kid’s crafts, but when it comes to my own art projects, I don’t like to share,” says Hendricks on her blog. “Since she was engrossed in her own project, I thought I might be able to pull it off… […]
Perfect, perfect, perfect. I have just quit my day job to have a creative life, and there’s been a delay getting the kids in school, and I have been so frustrated. so frustrated. and I love your collaboration. Your resistance, and your acknowledgement of the futility of that resistance. Totally sharing on my funnermother page (I have NOT been a funnermother this month, at all!). much love xx Angela
These are a breath of fresh air….I love the idea of them being a children’s book. You both are very talented. I am inspired to collaborate with my daughter now to see what we come up with.
Not only are these amazing, as an artist (textiles) and sewist myself, you taught me a very valuable lesson that I will be sure to impart to my 3.5 year old daughter. Trying to find that alone time to indulge in my arts has been extremely difficult without my daughter wanting to “help”, but now I will be much more patient and willing to share (boy – I’ve had Momma words turned on me too!) and I wonder what our collaborations will look like!
P.S. I let my daughter pick out a print for her bedroom. She chose the mermaid!